Valentine's Day. Yipee.

I get it.  It's a stupid holiday conjured up by card and candy companies with the goal of getting you to hand over your hard-earned money and probably not measure up anyway.  Single people either breathe a sigh of relief that they're off the hook or get depressed because they're left out.  Is anybody happy on this holiday?  No matter how cynical you may be about Valentine's Day, there is no denying that a turbulent or unsatisfying relationship negatively affects your wellbeing.  So, if you're in a relationship, just suck it up and make the best this holiday.  You might be surprised that it's easier and cheaper than you think. 

 

You've heard the saying "it's the thought that counts", right?  Let's be clear - that is not an excuse to be cheap.  You actually have to think and put in some effort.  If it doesn't turn out perfectly, that's ok.  Love isn't about perfection (thank goodness!).  But it is about paying attention to your partner's needs and desires and doing your best to fulfill them.  Here is a blog devoted to creative dates on a budget:

 

Ideas from Love, Actually (scroll down past the buttons)

 

And don't tell me you don't have time.  There is a saying about health that if you don't find time for exercise, you'll have to make time for illness (or something to that effect).  The same is true in a relationship.  Date nights are cheaper than counseling sessions - and definitely cheaper than attorney fees!

 

Love this quote about dating and kids:

 

"When you have kids, it’s easy to make excuses for not being able to find some dating time for yourselves. The realities of having a family leave little money, time, or energy for a date night. But, you can’t let this get in the way of your marriage! Good parenting is about taking care of your children and keeping them safe. But it’s also about being their role model. What we forget is that children are sponges, constantly absorbing the world around them. They observe your priorities and what makes you tick. So their ideas about what a strong marriage is and how to eventually form and manage their own relationships comes directly from the horse’s mouth—you!
One of the most important love lessons you can give your children is the knowledge that their parents absolutely adore one another and want to spend time together. They need to see love in action. Seems enough incentive to start speed-dialing a sitter right now, wouldn’t you say?"

 

-Lisa Sussman, Redbook’s 500 Great Dates

 

And one more thought on Valentine's Day.  A lot of people don't celebrate it because of the commercialism and pressure.  That's fine and dandy if both parties are truly on the same page and you truly take the time to celebrate your relationship on your terms.  But it's not a get out of jail free card.  You still owe it to yourself and your partner to celebrate your relationship.  And hopefully it's more than just once a year!

 

Happy Valentine's Day everybody!